I was woken up twice early Wednesday morning.

First, I had an anxiety dream about and IRL streamer that cut off half of his face and ate it. I was struggling to avoid seeing the video so much that I woke up at 3 am.

At 5am, I was woken up again by sirens and yelling. It was a cop shouting "get out, the building is on fire!" I ignored it for a while until I begrudgingly relented to the social pressure to feign interest in whether or not my neighbors and I are going to burn to death.

what i'm reading§

"On Truth and Lies in a Non-moral Sense"§

Bestie wanted to read this Nietzsche essay cited by Baudrillard and Foucalt, so I said we should do a reading group.

It's mostly prose, so there's a lot of tangents or 'lines of flight' you can follow into other fields of philosophy-- epistemology, phenomenology, structuralism, etc.. I approached this from a 'theory of mind' angle cuz that's what I've read the most about.

I think I fall on the side of agreeing with Nietzsche that one's perspective of reality is an unstable house-of-cards constructed in language, but disagree that that necessarily means humans fall into a Lovecraftian abyss of insanity when our beliefs about the world get challenged.

The Notebook Trilogy by Ágota Kristóf§

The Notebook is dark as fuck so it's crazy it's the inspiration for Mother 3. Nietzsche probably would've liked the fucked-up idiosyncratic morality of the little boys.

what i'm listening to§

Kilo Kish - Negotiations EP§

It feels very appropriate to Kilo Kish's statements about the technocapitalist commodification of identity that my music metadata software wants to label this EP as 'R&B' when it's clearly synth pop. I remember FKA Twigs saying something about how when she was releasing her music anonymously, the music press called it 'experimental pop', but when they found out it was being made by a Black woman it was suddenly 'R&B/Hip Hop'.

I'd love some extended dance remixes of these tracks. The synths are so layered, I'd love to hear them build on each other techno-style.

what i'm watching§

Trainspotting§

Trainspotting's alright. Great soundtrack. I got jumpscared by the riff in Underworld's "Dark and Long (Dark Train)" that's sampled in PinkPantheress's "Illegal".

something i liked§

Arch saved my (battery) life§

I installed Arch Linux with KDE Plasma on my laptop and now its battery lasts a lot longer than it did with Gnome on Ubuntu or Windows.

something i hated§

They canceled my $300 HDD order§

I tried to buy two 10TB hard drives from Memory4Less for ~$160 each, which was the best price I could find considering that just one 10TB HDD from most other places starts at $400. After a couple days they canceled my order.

It is such a bad fucking time to get into self-hosting my media. Look at the prices. We're so cooked.

a picture:§

The fire and the trucks on my block.